The Truth About KoolAid Laguna's Tale
by Azzi Vile
Summary: An old classic of mine Just some random adventures in Deling City, with Laguna, Kiros, Ward, and me and my friend. An OC, but the review say its worth it.
1. KOOOOOOLLLLLLLAAAAIIIIDDD YYYEEEAAAHHH!

Author notes: I do not own anything that has to do with this fic. Not Laguna, Not Kiros, Not Ward or anything, the only thing I own is my friend and I who are in this fic. AND I KNOW THAT EVERYONE NEVER READS THIS SO I GET ON WITH MY STORY THAT MAY BE SURPRISINGLY FUNNY TO SOME BUT NOT ALL, AND EXCUSE ME IF I TEND TO RANT ON AND ON AND...  
  
The scene takes place in that car thing that they drive to Deling city  
  
Kiros: Laguna!! WHERE ARE WE!!!!!  
  
Laguna:(singing) Mary had a steamboat. The steamboat had a bail. huh whaa? SWERVE!!!!  
  
Ward: there goes another pedestrian.  
  
Laguna: 10 POINTS wait was he wearing white pants?  
  
Ward: there caught in the windshield wipers!!  
  
Laguna: yeah those are really nice pants, really nice..  
  
Kiros: are you easily amused by.. FRIEGHT LINER!!!!!!  
  
(Swerves and barely misses the semi)  
  
Kiros: (holding the sides of the car) uhh uh.ahhhhhhh!!  
  
Laguna: (looks out the side of the car) such a pretty birdie.  
  
Ward: (calmly) station wagon  
  
(Swerves again)  
  
Kiros is having a nervous break down before they even get to the Pub, Ward is taking a nap in the back and Laguna is easily being distracted from the cracks in the road to the pretty on coming headlights.  
  
Ward: (waking up) Hey we there yet?  
  
Kiros.ahhh ahhha hahhh.  
  
Laguna: Ward must you act like a child? When the car stops. (Car comes to a sudden stop) Laguna: WERE HERE!!!!!  
  
After many attempts to Parallel Park they did it! With a little help from Ward, they got out and tried to peel Kiros off the seat, SUCCESS! They make it to the pub for a cold relaxing drink Or so they think.  
  
Bartender: what'll it be?  
  
Laguna: I don't really feel like getting drunk tonight  
  
Kiros: that's new  
  
Laguna: have anything without alcohol in it  
  
Bartender: yeah we got this Magic Kool-Aid in the back we got by accident.  
  
Laguna: hmm? Never heard of it. Guess Ill try it.  
  
Kiros: tequila  
  
Ward: cold beer  
  
Bar tender: be right back, with your order  
  
Kiros: that's a first time I seen you turn down a beer  
  
Ward: something wrong?  
  
Laguna: no just need a pick me up of some sort, and if something has the word magic in it has to be good. I guess.  
  
(Bartender comes back with their drinks)  
  
Bartender: here you are sirs  
  
Kiros and Ward drink theirs but Laguna tends to just stare at his with amazement.  
  
Kiros: what? Aren't you going to drink it?  
  
Laguna: Its blue! I never seen anything so pretty, I almost don't want to drink it  
  
Ward: so you bought a drink just so you can look at it  
  
Kiros: you know that is kind of neat that it's blue  
  
Ward: yeah but why don't you drink it?  
  
Laguna: yeah I suppose your right  
  
Laguna takes one sip, stares at it for a moment, then gets wide eyed and finishes the entire glass of in a matter of seconds.  
  
Laguna: WHOA that's was sweet to much sugar  
  
Kiros: wait there's sugar in that?  
  
Laguna: yeah, tastes very sweet  
  
All of a sudden something just clicks in the back of Laguna's mind, as he gets wide eyed again.  
  
Kiros: Ward something's up with Laguna, or did you notice?  
  
Laguna is now swinging from a curtain, and falls off then makes a dart for the door pressing himself against the wall then flinging himself onto the floor, it looks like he's trying to play mission impossible.  
  
Ward: no, why?  
  
Kiros: well look at him!!!  
  
Laguna is seen barricading the door, screaming something about naked mole rats and that they want his hair.  
  
Laguna: THEY`RE NOT GANNA GET IT, NEVER!!!!!  
  
Kiros: Check please!  
  
As they attempt to Pull Laguna out the back door, with many tries (many many tries) They are successful. But as soon as Laguna leaves the Bar he disappears.  
  
Kiros: great now we have to go look for him  
  
Ward: who said we had to?  
  
Kiros: sad enough as it is, he is our friend (unfortunately) and we must go find him before the city pays for Laguna's stupidity.  
  
Ward: Your just fulls of words today aren't you?  
  
Kiros: BLAME THE AUTHOR AND HER PYSCHOPATHIC FRIEND!!!!!  
  
Ward: why did the author do this to us?  
  
Kiros: her attempt to make people laugh.  
  
Ward: oh  
  
(Suddenly the author and her friend appear)  
  
Author: that's right blame it all on me and my friend, I SEE HOW IT IS!!! You think you Know everything, WELL IM NOT BUYING IT!!! Feel safe now little soldiers but when you least expect it Ill be there, to make sure you screw up big time.  
  
(Then as if by magic the author and her friend disappear into the street)  
  
Ward: does she have something against us?  
  
Kiros: no she's just a freak. Lets go find Laguna  
  
Ward: she scares me a bit.  
  
Mean while where ever the author and her friend are (probably somewhere near Laguna)  
  
Author: hey I have a brilliant beyond all brilliant ideas ever to be thought by a. brilliant person.  
  
Friend: OHHHHHH OH OH OH!!!!! Share your thoughts, shareshareshareshareshare  
  
Author: Lets get Laguna even more Hyper.  
  
Friend: but what good will that do?  
  
Author: we must answer that all important question  
  
Friend: and that would be (shaking with excitement)  
  
Author: how many cups of sugar does it take to get to the moon?  
  
Friend: LETS SING A SONG  
  
Both: Puff the magic dragon lives by the sea.  
  
What does the Author have in store for Laguna? (Wait I mentioned it during the story.. Oh well) Where is Laguna? (Oh oh I know I know!!!) How much sugar does it take to get to the moon? (TELL ME) And will the people in the white coats ever find the Author and her Friends whereabouts (NEVER HAHAHAHAH) come back next time for chapter two IF ONLY I CAN FIGURE OUT WHAT IT IS!!!! Tell me what you think and I'll put more chapters up KAY, bye-bye 


	2. AUTHOR AND FRIENDS MOMENT OF FAME WELL S...

Author Notes: everything in this fic isn't mine except the Author and Friend bit but I own nothing, do you hear nothing!!!  
  
We go back to Kiros and Ward.  
  
Kiros: why of all days, why?  
  
Ward: maybe Laguna's at the park  
  
Kiros: what ever gave you that idea?  
  
Ward: I don't know weird plot intuition?  
  
Kiros:.ok let's go  
  
Back where the author and friend are hanging out.  
  
Author: you know what I'm sick of writing author down  
  
Friend: yeah, and I don't like being referred to as 'friend' GIVE ME A NAME!!!  
  
Author: ok your name is Ania and mines Rouge ok?  
  
Ania: Kay. hey look there's Laguna!!!  
  
Laguna is seen chasing people away with a stick screaming something unintelligible  
  
Laguna: (looking at Ania) YOU SHALL BE MY QUEEN  
  
Ania: AHHHHHHHHHHHHH (runs away)  
  
Rouge: don't you leave me here!!!!  
  
Ania and Rouge are seen running away  
  
Rouge: this is bad, this is very bad (looks down) hey a dime.  
  
Rouge stops to pick up the dime looking very pleased with her self when Laguna spots her.  
  
Laguna: AH HAHAHAHAAAAA!!!!!!  
  
Rouge:(distressed) AHHHHHHHHHH  
  
Ania pulls up in an old Chevy truck  
  
Ania: hop in, hurry!!!!!  
  
Rouge: that's the ugliest damn car I ever did see.  
  
Ania: WHO CARES  
  
Rouge: I like it I like it. its so. vintage!!  
  
Laguna hurls himself at Rouge.  
  
Rouge: yeah so I saw this movie and it sucked ass.  
  
Ania: yeah I have to agree with you on. WHAT IN GODS NAME IS THAT  
  
Rouge turns around  
  
Rouge: oh that, that's Laguna  
  
Laguna is still miraculously airborne.  
  
Rouge: lets find Kiros and Ward  
  
Ania: okay but I'm driving  
  
Rouge: the hell you are  
  
Rouge is about to push Ania over to the passenger side of the truck  
  
Ania: HELP HELP I DON`T HAVE ANY PREPARATION H  
  
Rouge: WHATS THAT HAVE TO DO WITH ANYTHING?  
  
Ania: I haven`t the slightest.  
  
Rouge opens the door to hit the amazing airborne Laguna into temporary submission  
  
Rouge: lets find the others  
  
Rouge starts the car and drives off  
  
Within a few seconds of driving the find they others  
  
Kiros: oh god it's the author and her freakish friend  
  
Ania: WE HAVE NAMES NOW HOORAY FOR US!!!  
  
Rouge: yeah okay  
  
Kiros: what did you do to Laguna? You didn't feed him any more sugar?  
  
Ania: HOW DID YOU KNOW ABOUT THAT? ARE YOU STALKERS? ARE YOU WITH THE GOVERNMENT? CAN I HAVE A SODA?!!! GIVE ME A DOLLAR!!!  
  
Ward: you have more issues than your friend and Laguna put together  
  
Rouge: Hey I have an idea.  
  
Ania: what, what is it?  
  
Rouge: lets interrogate Kiros and Ward.  
  
Ania: yeah and walk around with a video camera screaming intellectual words with our mouths open while going through the car wash with an umbrella.  
  
Everyone but Rouge looks very disturbed  
  
Rouge: and eat pudding?  
  
Ania: WHY NOT  
  
Both: yeah we get pudding!!!  
  
Kiros: lets go get Laguna before they find out were gone  
  
Ward: yes they scare me too much  
  
Kiros and Ward sneak away while Rouge and Ania do a little dance  
  
Ok I know that was primarily about my friend and I but hey we just had to say a few things, bear with us in these moments we ran out of Ania's medication.  
  
Will Laguna get ever wake up? Will Ania and Rouge find Kiros and Ward? Will they even know there gone? Find out in the next chapter, if I can remember what I'm doing. 


	3. A RESULT OF TO MUCH PROZAC OR SOMETHING ...

Author notes: I just love making stories and making people laugh thank you for you reviews and such, when I found out that people read my story I went out side at 11:00pm And ran laps around my yard; I guess you all ready know that I don't own anything but us so ehh  
  
Kiros and Ward are walking down the street to where Laguna lies and hover over him for a short while, then as if by magic he springs awake as if nothing happened at all.  
  
Kiros: hey Laguna you ok?  
  
Ward: yeah we thought you bit the dust for sure  
  
Laguna: hey, where's the longhaired girl and the shorthaired friend of hers?  
  
Kiros: you mean the author Rouge and her friend Ania? They're over there causing trouble  
  
We see the freaks of nature arguing about something  
  
Ania: (lifts her pant leg up) this is how you hitch hike  
  
Many cars honk their horns at Ania  
  
Rouge: nuh uhh this is how  
  
A city bus drives by and Rouge flings her self onto the windshield  
  
Rouge: STOP!!  
  
Bus comes to a sudden halt  
  
Lady Bus Driver: hey get off my windshield I gatta go to the shopping arcade NOW!!!  
  
Rouge: HEY you remind me of a song..(begins to sing) Lady bus driiiiver you take no shi...  
  
(The windshield wipers whip Rouge off the windshield)  
  
Rouge: WHOOO LETS DO IT AGAIN!!!  
  
Ania: that's a neat trick my turn..  
  
Kiros and Ward witness the entire act  
  
Kiros: our author and her friend, is starting to scare the children AND adults.  
  
Ward: they on some sort of medication?  
  
Kiros: most likely..  
  
They turn to Laguna, but he's off again to make lives more miserable (but to make us laugh) he is seen sprinting over to the park were many come to see a weekly fireworks display.  
  
Kiros: I think we should pass on trying to calm him down, let alone go after him!  
  
Ward: but then we'd be stuck with them...  
  
Rouge and Ania are skipping down the street with werewolf masks on singing a little tune forcing many to flee from the scene  
  
Both: twinkle twinkle little star, I know who you aaarrreee, I-know-where-you-sleep-at-night, SoSleepWithOneEyeOpen  
  
Kiros: good point and well made  
  
They go after Laguna and stop at the park entrance, people are seen covering their children's eyes, maybe even covering there own, some are leaving the park grumbling and some are fleeing in terror. Laguna has striped himself down to his boxers and a white muscle tee with his sock on his hands.  
  
Laguna: IMA PRETTY LAAADY, THAT CAME FROM THE OCEAN!!!! IMA PRETTY PRINCESS, LOOK AT MY CROWN!!!!!  
  
Laguna has his jacket over is head, suddenly he jumps into the lake screaming something really long  
  
Laguna: PNEMONOULTRAMICROSCOPICSILICOVOLCANIKILLIOSIS (SPLASH) Blimey that's cold (staggers out of the lake) here you see the croc has a keen sense of smell and long floppy ears, he eats worms and likes to crawl up women's dresses.  
  
Kiros: uhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh  
  
Ward: maybe we need help on this one but who do we ask  
  
Both: Hmmmmmmmm....  
  
Rouge and Ania pop out of a tree  
  
Rouge: hello!!!  
  
Ania: hello!!!  
  
Kiros: someone who has a high IQ  
  
Ania: E=Mc2 (pops and sizzles are heard as sparks fly from her head) OWWWWW!!!!!!  
  
Ward: someone who's fast  
  
Rouge is seen running  
  
Rouge: AAARRRRGGGGHHHHHH (slams into a tree and squirrels and chipmunks swarm her body)  
  
Kiros and Ward: someone in white coats  
  
Rouge is seen wearing a long white trench coat and is wearing a straight jacket  
  
Rouge: I did it all by myself :)  
  
Kiros: what make you think we would want your help?  
  
Rouge: because.... I RULE YOUR LIVES, now escort me to the sick one!!!  
  
  
  
Yay for me I made two chapters in one night, hooray for us HEY I have an idea. How about you review this and Ill just read it Tell me your thoughts about this story; PLEASE I won't eat until you DOOOOO  
  
What is Ania and Rouge ganna do? Will Rouge let Ania out of the straight jacket? Does she even know how? Will you keep on reading this pointless story? Find out next chapter THE FLAMING GREASE BALL (hey I got a name for the chapter yay) most likely be up tomorrow, REVIEW PLEEAASSE 


	4. FLAMING GREASE BALLS

Author notes: okay my vision is a little blurry today so if anything's wrong forgive me. Also for those who think this is the end chapter, its not there's plenty more to come. You know the drill I don't own this blah blah blah!!!! Don't sue me; I need to get back to Arizona, I'm staying with my dad, help!!!!  
  
Rouge: (half asleep) ZZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZzzzzzzzz  
  
Ania: (still in jacket) I'm a little TEEAA POT, Short and stout Hey rouge what comes next?  
  
Rouge: (falling to the ground) toothpaste and a squirrel make the perfect gift for any appointment with a little help from ehhhhhhh (SLAM)  
  
Kiros: can you believe those two?  
  
Ward: I'm still trying to get use to them being around  
  
Kiros: okay lets get Laguna  
  
Ward: there's a key word to go with that sentence and that's 'try'  
  
Rouge is still snoring on the ground while Ania is trying to go the Macarena  
  
Ania:(trying to dance) ehhh ehhhhhh EHHHHHHHH I cant do it, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH Rouge help help I can't dance! Help me!!!!  
  
Rouge: (wakes up) yawn~~huh?  
  
Ania: ROUGE, I CAN'T DANCE!!!!!!  
  
Rouge: HEY, where did they get to?  
  
Ania: have you not been listening to me, I need out of this JACKET!!!!!!  
  
Rouge: okay lets see if I know how, and them lets get frozen lemonades  
  
Ania: YAY WE GET SUGAR!!!!!!!  
  
Kiros and Ward look from a distance  
  
Kiros: we call charter for them after this is through  
  
Ward: good idea  
  
Laguna is swimming in the lake and crawls out once more and tries to scale a near by light post, failing miserably.  
  
Laguna: THE INCHWORMS ARE IN THE GROUND DON`T STEP ON IT!!! PINEAPPLES!!!!  
  
Kiros: is it just me or is he getting worse?  
  
Ward: actually I think he's getting better  
  
Kiros: really? We need to take him of that sugar high, but what cures a sugar high?  
  
Both: Hhhhhmmmmmm  
  
Ward: I KNOW!!!!!  
  
(Ward looks towards Laguna)  
  
Ward: HEY LAGUNA, JULIA IS PLAYING AT THE HOTEL TONIGHT!!!!  
  
Laguna: really? Are we going?  
  
Ward: get your clothes back on and we may think about it  
  
Laguna: my clothes? OH YEAH, the mushrooms said they'd watch em for me while I frolicked through the fields.  
  
Kiros: yeah in your underwear!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: what? Can't a person be FREEEEE???!!!!  
  
Kiros: not in a public park they can't!!!!!!  
  
Ward: you calmed down now?  
  
Laguna: yeah I think so  
  
Kiros: thank goodness, we thought we'd have to call in the National Guard  
  
Walking up to Kiros, Ward, and Laguna with three frozen lemonades  
  
Rouge: (shivering) this is great, this is really great (takes sip)  
  
Ania: (shaking) YEAH this is sour but it has loads of sugar in it (inhales her drink)  
  
Rouge: (whispering) now its time to take matters into our own hands  
  
Ania: but I don't know what one looks like?  
  
Rouge: hey Laguna we bought you a frozen Lemonade  
  
Kiros: well Lemonade can't do much harm, they only put a little sugar in it, I guess  
  
Laguna takes a sip and finds it utterly impossible to separate with it  
  
Laguna: ITS MINE YOU UNDERSTAND MMIINNNEEE, GET AWAY SQUIRELL CREATURES OF THE UNDER WORLD BEGONE INTO A PUFF OF SMOKE SO I CAN EAT YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Kiros: (turns to face Rouge) what have you done? Huh?  
  
Rouge and Ania are shaking so bad they can hardly stop their teeth from chattering  
  
Ania: ThatsaGoodLemonadeHuhRouge?  
  
Rouge: yepyepyepyepyepyepyepyepyepedie yepyepyep!!!!!!  
  
Kiros: Ward  
  
Ward: yes?  
  
Kiros: call charter  
  
Ward: got change?  
  
Kiros: godamit  
  
  
  
  
  
Well that the other chapter I guess. So if this ones not as funny as the others but still Ill make more if I can remember  
  
Question time:  
  
Will Kiros and Ward ever find change for a pay phone? Will Laguna ever figure out that the stuff we give him is sugar? Will the men in the white coat ever find out twitching bodies? WILL THIS CAT EVER STOP SLEEPING IN MY LAP WHEN I'M TYPING? Find out next time in the next chapter, DEAD HAMPSTER IN A WAST BASKET. 


	5. DEAD HAMPSTER IN A WAIST BASKET

Author notes: HEY READ THIS PLEASE~~ Hey peeps I have an idea, those of you that review how about giving me ideas and if I like them I will dedicate them to you, or in other word give me ideas for the next chapters and Ill do what I can to make them funny and you'll get credit after the fic, how's that sound. Oh yeah, I don't own anything in this fic, not even the songs we sing, so stop calling me!!!  
  
Kiros: well I guess we go bum money off of people  
  
Ward: I guess  
  
Ward and Kiros walk away to go get moneys mean while we focus on our poor demented friends running through the streets.  
  
Rouge: (running) IM GONNA MAKE IT TO McDONALDS BEFORE YOU AND WHEN I GET THERE YOU KNOW WHAT IM GANNA DO?  
  
Ania: WHAT WHAT ARE YOU GANNA DO?  
  
Rouge: IM GANNA PLAY IN THE BALL PIT  
  
Laguna: AND IM GANNA BUY A HAPPY MEAL  
  
Ania: HEY I WANT A HAPPY MEAL TOO  
  
Rouge: HEY LETS ALL HAVE HAPPY MEALS  
  
All: YEAH  
  
They arrive at McDonalds  
  
Rouge: I WANT A HAPPY MEAL  
  
Laguna & Ania: WE ALL WANT HAPPY MEALS!!!!!!  
  
Cashier: You three want happy meal?  
  
Rouge: DID WE STUDDER?  
  
Cashier: ok that'll be  
  
All: WE GET HAPPY MEAL WE GET HAPPY MEAL WE GET HAPPY MEAL WE GET HAPPY MEAL WE GET HAPPY MEAL WE GET HAPPY MEAL WE GET HAPPY MEAL WE GET HAPPY MEAL WE GET HAPPY MEALS WE GET HAPPY ME WE GET HAPPY MEAL WE GET HAPPY MEALS WE GET HAPPY MEAL WE GET HAPPY MEAL WE GET HAPPY MEALS  
  
Cashier: OKAY I GIVE UP JUST TAKE EM AND EAT OVER THERE  
  
Rouge: hey where's my soda? You only gave us cups  
  
Cashier: you get it your self; they're right over there  
  
Ania: YAY, we get our own drink I want a Diet-DR.-Mountain-Coke  
  
Laguna: yeah, and I want a Pepper-Dew-Cola  
  
Rouge: YEAH and I want a Sprite-Pepsi-Pepper-Cola on the rocks  
  
All: YEAH 2 POINTS  
  
They get their happy meals but instead of sitting and eating it the want to mess with the fountain drinks instead  
  
Rouge: press the button water goes on, release the button soda goes on  
  
Ania: on and off on and off  
  
Laguna: I need to go to the bathroom be back in a sec  
  
Rouge takes so orange juice and spills it all the way to the mans bathroom  
  
Janitor: WHAT ARE YOU DOING?  
  
Ania: he had to go  
  
Rouge gets up in the janitors face  
  
Rouge: (creepy and slow) rreeaallllyy bad  
  
Janitor runs away  
  
Ania: Hey rouge lets go play in the ball pit  
  
Rouge: yeah and spread ketchup all in the tubs  
  
Both: YAY  
  
Laguna comes back and dives into the balls with Ania and Rouge who are very well concealed in the balls Laguna: whatcha doing?  
  
Ania: were ganna scare kids when the come in here  
  
Laguna: cool can I join?  
  
Rouge: come along for the ride  
  
They dig into the balls so no one can see them  
  
Kid: hey lets play in here okay?  
  
They come into the ball pit and the three snap up  
  
Laguna: let me nibble your ear  
  
Ania: BRAINS  
  
Rouge: SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW  
  
Kid screams bloody murder and runs away  
  
Laguna: you think Kiros and Ward are having as much fun as we are?  
  
Hey, I got another two chapters in today I feel so proud of my self. If you lucky I may put up another chapter tonight. Thank for the reviews.  
  
Will Ania, Laguna, and Rouge be thrown out of McDonalds? Will Kiros and Ward ever find money? Will we snap out our sugar high? Find out in the next chapter, EVIL YELLOW SNOWBALL. 


	6. EVIL YELLOW SNOWBALL

Authors note: I have no idea how I'm going to type up this chapter, to tell you the truth I just make this stuff up as I go along, but people must be liking it I guess, but from know on please if you review these stories, BE TRUTHFUL IN YOUR REVIEWS FROM NOW ON!! I don't want to keep uploading something no one likes, is that understandable or is it asking to much? Anyway I own nothing and all that other crap, I just do this to further expand your minds to the 'what if ' theory kay  
  
After the scene at McDonalds, we see Kiros and Ward trying to find money.  
  
Kiros: isn't this against the law?  
  
Ward: if the moneys in plain site, out in the open, not heavily guarded then its alright, its just like dropping loose change in the street.  
  
Kiros: oh kay  
  
Hospital employee: HEY GET OUT OF THE FOUNTAIN, ASSHOLE!!  
  
Kiros: (mimicking) oh no Kiros it's not illegal to take change out of a WISHING WELL!!!  
  
Ward: well we got enough change  
  
Kiros and Ward start running.  
  
Back to McDonalds  
  
Cashier: AND STAY OUT OR NEXT TIME WE WILL CALL YOUR PARENTS!!!!  
  
Laguna: OHNO NOT MAMA LOIRE, SHE`LL WHOOP ME  
  
Rouge: yeah, oh no I'm coming off my sugar high, I'm no longer able to scream and slur my words any more, we must find the biggest sugar high drink of them all!!!!!  
  
Ania: yeah, I feel a bit calm myself, what should we have now?  
  
Laguna: SUGAR AND COFFEE!!!!!!  
  
Both: YAY  
  
They all go to Star Bucks and drink a few coffees with lots of sugar in it and a few sugar cubs on the side, and with in a blink of an eye they're hyper once more.  
  
Ania: HEY ROUGE  
  
Rouge: YEAH?  
  
Ania: LETS GO TO A MOVIE  
  
All: YEAH LETS GO SEE A MOVIE  
  
Back to Kiros and Ward  
  
Kiros: ok now hand me the change  
  
Ward: right (feels in his pocket but nothings there)  
  
Kiros: come on man, we need change for the pay phone, hurry.  
  
Ward: there seems to be a hole in my pocket  
  
Kiros: son-of-a-bitch  
  
At the movies  
  
Movie: oh James I just can't live without you, kiss me (smooch  
  
Rouge: NO THAT'S NOT A WOMEN JAMES IT'S A MAN, OH YOU BASTARD YOU KISSED HER HOW COULD YOU KNOW THE WEDDING WILL BE RUINED!!!!  
  
Ania: COME ON GO FOR THE SLUT IN THE BACK, SHE AT LEAST DOESN`T LOOK LIKE A PISS ANT  
  
Movie: oh Mary I wish this could moment could last for ever  
  
Laguna: IT WON'T LAST VERY LONG UNTILL YOU FIND OUT THAT SHE HAS A DI.....  
  
Audience: SSSHHHHHHH  
  
All: MAKE US, ASS WIPE  
  
Theater security escorts them of the premises  
  
Security: next time we will kick you ass  
  
Ania: now where do we go?  
  
After a second or so  
  
All: BASEBALL GAME!!!!!  
  
How was that?  
  
What will happen at the game? Will Kiros: keep on saying 'big kid' words? Find out next time in REVENGE OF THE GOLDFISH 


	7. REVENGE OF THE GOLDFISH

Authors notes: sorry I haven't updated in a while my disk drive didn't like me this week so I had to retype it once more. I own nothing in this fic lalalalalala.  
  
  
  
Laguna, Ania, and Rouge are out side the Ticket Master's office to get tickets to the ball game.  
  
Laguna: THREE TICKETS  
  
Ticket Master: to what?  
  
Rouge: THE BASEBALL GAME!!!! IT'S THE TIMBER WOLVES VS. THE DOLLET DODGERS, WE MUST SEE IT!!!!! WE MUST-WE MUST-WE MUST-SEE IT!!!  
  
Ania: YESSSSS!!!!!! THEY HAVE BATHROOMS AND SELL HOTDOGS AND STUFF LIKE THAT, AND COTTON CANDY!!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: COTTON CANDY?  
  
Ania: COTTON CANDY!!!!  
  
Rouge: COTTON CANDY?  
  
All: (singing) COTTON CANDY!!!! IS ALL FUN AND GAMES, COTTON CANDY!!!! IT ROTS OUT YOUR BRAINS  
  
Ticket master: yeah, ok!? That's 300gil each  
  
Laguna: all I have is 2,000gil  
  
Ticket Master: that'll do  
  
Ania: you are one sneaky person Laguna  
  
Rouge: LETS SEE THE GAME, AND EAT THINGS!!!!!!!  
  
All: YAY  
  
Inside the stadium  
  
Umpire: ATRIKE THREE, YER OUT!!!!  
  
Rouge: WHAT?!! NOT MONTELLO, IM HAVING HIS LOVE CHILD!!!!!  
  
Montello: what? I never seen you before in my entire life  
  
Rouge: that's because I was hiding! IN THE OBSERVATORY WITH A CANDLESTICK  
  
Umpire: HEY WERE ON LIVE TV WE NEED TO GET ON WITH THE GAME  
  
Ania: LIVE TV? (Stands up and waves at who knows what) HI TEACHER IM SORRY I MISSED SCHOOL TODAY, I NEEDED CAT SCAN TO SEE IF ANYTHING IS GOING ON UP THERE!! AND JUST TO LET YOU KNOW, THE TEST CAME BACK NEGATIVE!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: HEY, COTTON CANDY OVER HERE!!!!  
  
Concessionaire: how many sir?  
  
Laguna: 1 for me  
  
Ania: 2 for me  
  
Rouge: 2 for me  
  
Concessionaire: here you go, that's 100gil please  
  
Ania:(reaches into pocket and pulls out lint) will this cover it?  
  
Concessionaire: um lets see uh no  
  
Rouge: here you go  
  
Concessionaire: ma'am this is a ticket to a movie they haven't shown in years  
  
Rouge: so what's the problem?  
  
Concessionaire: nothing this ones on me, I guess  
  
All: FREE SUGAR, YAY  
  
Laguna takes small nips off his  
  
Laguna: this is even sweeter than the kool-aid I had earlier  
  
Ania taking big bites out of hers  
  
Ania: (mouth full) yeath thith ith the bethest crap I heaver eaten  
  
Rouge literally inhales hers  
  
Rouge: I HAVE A BRILLIANT IDEA THAT'S SO BRILLIANT IT SHOCKES ME JUST THINKING ABOUT IT  
  
Ania: doooooo tellllllll  
  
(Starts whispering)  
  
All: YAY  
  
Back to Kiros and Ward. They give up in trying to get change from off the streets, and go back to the previous pub to relax  
  
Kiros: Ward, what are we going to do?  
  
Ward: you act as if I know, its 3:00 in the morning I'm too tired to think  
  
Kiros: me too  
  
Ward: lets turn on the game, see who's winning  
  
Kiros gets up out of his seat to turn on the TV  
  
TV: ~WELL FOLKS ITS AN ACTION PACKED NIGHT, AS WE SEE THAT HARDLY ANY ONE IS IN THE SEATS TO NIGHT, WELL I GUESS ITS THERE LOSS~  
  
Kiros: I almost wish I were there  
  
Ward: yeah  
  
TV: ~ AS YOU CAN SEE THE TIMBER WOLVES ARE AHEAD BY 8 AND... HEY WHO ARE YOU PEOPLE OUCH, HEY, AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH  
  
Laguna: HEY ROUGE YOU WERE RIGHT FLINGING PEOPLE OUT WINDOWS IS AS FUN AS SHOOTING PLASTIC MONKEYS IN A BARREL, WHILE EATING ICE CREAM  
  
Rouge: SEE!!!! HEY WERE ON TV HELLO EVERY ONE (WAVES)  
  
Ania: HAHAHAHAHA I CAN SEE YOU!!!! HEHEHE I CAN SEE ALL OF YOU!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: I GET TO BE ANNOUNCER  
  
Rouge: SELL IT LAGUNA BABY SELL IT!!!!!!  
  
Ania: WWWWOOOOOOOOOO HHHHHHHOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHA  
  
Back at he pub  
  
Kiros:(gawking) omygosh  
  
Ward: this will be entertaining, hey bartender how about some popcorn  
  
  
  
Well what do you think, it would be the greatest if anyone would read and review this!! I really mean it. I only do this to make people happy. And if you're not happy please tell me.  
  
Will Kiros convince Ward to go after us? Why is there a baseball game at 3:00 in the morning? Will there be any affect to the cotton candy we just ate? WILL MY SPONGEBOB SQUAREPANTS BOXERS EVER GET OUT OF THE DRYER SO I CAN GO TO BED? Find out next time in POPCORN BALLS OF THE BOTTOM FEEDERS, BYE YA'LL 


	8. POPCORN BALLS OF THE BOTTOM FEEDERS

Authors notes: HEY PEOLE I'M BROKE AND I OWN NOTHING, NOT EVEN THIS COMPUTER I'M TYPEING ON ISN'T MINE.  
  
Kiros and Ward are still in the pub. Kiros is wondering what's going on, while Ward is sitting back and enjoying the show.  
  
Kiros: this is serious Ward; we need to go after them  
  
Ward: how about after the game, this is the best damn sports show ever  
  
Kiros: WE (points at himself then Ward) NEED TO GOOO (points out the door) GET THEM (points at the TV)  
  
Ward: AFTER I (points to self) WATCH (pulls down eye lid) THE SHOW (points to TV)  
  
Kiros: dude they could be arrested by the time that show is over!!!  
  
Ward: no they.. hey, did you just call me dude?  
  
Kiros: does it matter?  
  
Ward: well no but, still you called me dude  
  
Kiros: (grinds teeth) GRRRRRRRRRRR  
  
Moments later we see that Ward has been thrown out the window  
  
Ward: owwwwww, dang man for a scrawny person you can sure be strong at times  
  
Kiros comes stomping out of the door rolling up his sleeve while gritting his teeth  
  
Kiros: MOVE IT  
  
Ward springs up and starts to run in the direction of the stadium  
  
BBBAAACCCKKK at the stadium announcer's chair  
  
Laguna: AS YOU CAN SEE DOWN THERE NUMBER 1359 HAS PASSED THE BALL TO THAT FIELD OVER THERE AND HER KICKS IT A SCORES A TOUCH DOWN  
  
All: YAY 2 POINTS  
  
The players on the field stop playing and look at the announcer's booth, meanwhile a camera get a close up shot of one of the players and Ania and Rouge take a pen like thing that they use in football games to mark moves and stuff and draw mustaches on the players.  
  
Ania: as you can see this man has not shaved in at least a week, and this guys chin is to big, and he has an over bite, and....  
  
Rouge:(lying back in a chair while playing with a pattle-pall thing) you know Laguna I feel that we have gotten to know each other these past 7 hours  
  
Laguna: (talking like an announcer) that's right Rouge tell us what she's won.  
  
Rouge: A BRAND NEW BOBBY PIN, it holds your hair in place and makes it look all nice and stuff.  
  
Laguna: anything else?  
  
Rouge: I love you  
  
Laguna: all right then lets go to Ania  
  
Ania has totally ruined the TV with the pen  
  
Ania: as you can see in this region there have been major snowstorms, but a little hairspray gets that all out, thanks to the makers of this crappy hairspray I hold in my hand back to you Laguna.  
  
Laguna: do you really love me?  
  
Rouge: more than sunshine! In fact you're the reason I even wrote this fic! Its because there's not enough Laguna stories.  
  
Laguna: WOW, you obsessive freak!!!  
  
Rouge: I know  
  
Laguna: hey then whys she here? Does she like me too?  
  
Rouge: she's just here for the sugar  
  
Laguna: ohhhhhh  
  
Ania: HEY LETS GO PLAY BINGO AT THE BINGO PALACE  
  
All: YAY  
  
Well what do you think? HEY I CAN'T BE THE ONLY GIRL OUT HERE THAT THINKS LAGUNAS A STUD, WRITE TO ME AND TELL ME WHY YOU LIKE LAGUNA (that is in fact that you do)  
  
Will Kiros and Ward get to the stadium in time? Will I confess anything else? Will you read and review? Find out in the next chapter, BABY BOTTLES OF MAYONAISE, peace~~~}~@ 


	9. BABY BOTTLES OF MAYONAISE

Authors notes: well howdy ya'll!!! I'm back to tell you don't expect any updates till maybe Monday or Tuesday when I get back home to Arizona. Also to tell you that I don't own this or am I making any profit off this (trust me I'm not that smart)  
  
Kiros and Ward are running down the street and then stop at a bus stop and wait for the bus (obviously)  
  
Kiros: (panting) OK.. I think we can rest easy till the bus gets here  
  
Ward: (panting) yeah... Wow what a work out  
  
Kiros: it wasn't that bad we only ran 2 miles straight, with no stop, or any common sense...  
  
Ward: I have a feeling that we messed up some way or another  
  
Kiros: what do you mean?  
  
Ward: weird plot intuition?  
  
Kiros: again?  
  
As Kiros and Ward are standing at the bus stop! Laguna, Ania, and Rouge are off to the Bingo Palace to play bingo. (Heaven have mercy on the unsuspecting victims)  
  
Laguna: WERE GOING TO PLAY BINGO, WERE GOING TO PLAY BINGO!!!!!  
  
Ania: WERE GOING TO WIN, WER GOING TO WIN!!!!  
  
Rouge: WERE GOING TO GET CHEESE, WERE GOING TO GET CHEESE!!!!  
  
All: WERE GOING TO GO INSANE, WERE GOING TO GO INSANE!!!!  
  
They reach the palace and barge in to the door  
  
All: (wearing scream masks) WERE HERE!!!!!!!! GIVE US YOUR MEDICATIOOOONNNN!!!!!!  
  
Everyone runs screaming, some old ladies have a heart attack and since no one knew what they were or who they were, they were the only ones conscious. Later the police came and asked them a few questions.  
  
Police man: who did this?  
  
Laguna: IT WAS THREE MONSTERS!!! THEY CAME IN AND SCARED MY GRANDMA TO DEATH (pretends to cry) WHY GRANDMA WHY?  
  
Police man: which ones your grandma?  
  
Laguna: (looks at the old ladies) I don't know maybe the one on the left!!  
  
Police man: Ok, uhhh? You short haired girl  
  
Ania: YES???????  
  
Police man: can you tell me what these 'monsters' looked like?  
  
Ania: YES!!!! THEY HAD TAILS, AND BIG LONG EARS, AND POINTY TEETH LONGER THAN MY FINGERS, AND THEY HAD SNOT DRIPING DOWN THERE NOSES, AND....  
  
Police man: Ok that enough out of you!!! Hey you!! With the long hair  
  
Rouge points at herself  
  
Police man: (sarcastically) no that girl behind you  
  
Rouge: THEN QUIT POINTING AT ME, ITS RUDE!!!!!!!!!  
  
Police man: (to his partner) poor things there traumatized just look at them  
  
Laguna is doing flips of the wall, while Ania is skipping from side to side blowing raspberries, and finally Rouge is on the ground spinning on in a circle screaming something about the madness then they all get on the ground and start twitching rapidly as if forcing themselves into a seizure.  
  
Police mans partner: yeah. Want to go get some coffee?  
  
Police man: sure  
  
And with that they walk away  
  
Ania: hey I know what we can do now  
  
Both: WHAT ANIA? WHAT CAN WE DO RIGHT NOW?  
  
Ania: LETS GO PLAY TENNIS AT A PUBLIC AREA  
  
All: YAY  
  
  
  
Well hows that? I NEED REVIEWS PEOPLE!!!! I NEEED THEM OR I WILL EXPLODE!!! I do that some times.  
  
Will the police ever get their coffee? Why do we even want to focus on them? ( I guess we wont now will we?) Will the bus for Kiros and Ward ever come? WITH THIS CAT EVER STOP SCALEING MY LEG WHEN I EAT? Find out in the mind numbingly sequel, GIVE ME YOUR ALLERGY MEDICINE, bye now ~_^ 


	10. GIVE ME YOUR ALLERGY MEDICATION

Authors notes: its late at nite, 1 o'clock to be precise, me and my friend have been looking for my video game and we are getting very pissed off. I'm back home in AZ. I got a Lava lamp, its so cool, any ways I own nothing in this fic, so there. :P  
  
Kiros and Ward are still waiting at the bus stop  
  
Kiros: HEY, when is the #*&%$@ bus going to get here?  
  
Ward: you think I know?  
  
Kiros: well who else do I ask?  
  
Ward: why am I the one you ask?  
  
Kiros: who else is here?  
  
Ward: why are we talking in questions?  
  
Kiros:..........?  
  
back to the morons that seem to be going across the street with their tennis rackets in hand.  
  
Laguna: (singing to the tune of jingle bells) SANTA CLAUS, SANTA CLAUS, YOU ARE MUCH TO FAT........  
  
Rouge: I WAS SLEEPING PEACEFULLY, AND NOW MY BED IS FLAT......  
  
Ania: SANTA CLAUS, SANTA CLAUS, HOW MUCH DO YOU WEIGH?  
  
All: I'D HATE TO BE A REIGNDEER THAT HAS TO PULL YOUR SLEIGH  
  
Laguna: were here  
  
Crashes are still heard as the stand in the middle of the street, cars swerve by and go off the median in the road, causing head on collisions, hellicopters are seen circling the sky.  
  
News guy: and its becoming a bit of a problem in the down town area, its seems that three people are causing these wrecks just by standing in the street, the police are on there way down to arrest these people, BACK TO YOU BOB.......  
  
back in the streets  
  
Rouge: when do you think we should go in?  
  
Ania: when I can't look at the street lights anymore  
  
Laguna: LOOK FROZEN CHEESE ON A STICK  
  
they all look in that direction  
  
All: oooooHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!  
  
after they get there cheese and eat it, they FINALLY go into the park and play tennis (if only they knew how)  
  
Ania: I heard that if you hit the person, you get a point  
  
Laguna: I heard that this place is open twent-four seven  
  
Rouge: I heard that Kiros wears curlers to bed  
  
Ania: Laguna, is that true?  
  
Laguna: he use to before his put his hair in braids, he wore an afrow in the 70's  
  
Rouge: but he hardly has any more hair left, theres only enough for 2 or 3 small braids  
  
Laguna: his afrow was destroyed by a ceiling fan  
  
Both: oohhhhhhhh  
  
they go inside the park and get their rackets ready, BUT Ania and Laguna happen to find the automatic ball shooting thingy (I DON'T KNOW WHAT THERE CALLED)  
  
Ania: OHHHHH, what does this buttons do?  
  
Rouge:(just finished preparing) ALRIGHT I'M READY, SHOW ME WHAT YOU GOT!!!! I CAN TAKE ON TEN OF YOU  
  
Laguna: that can be arranged  
  
fiddles with the speed dial  
  
Ania: HEY? whats that little picture of a bunny?  
  
Laguna: I DON'T know  
  
starts to tamper with the intensity  
  
Ania: hey, whats with the little picture of a elephant?  
  
Laguna: I haven't the slightest idea  
  
Rouge: HEY WHATS TAKING SO LONG?  
  
Ania: nothing  
  
Laguna takes aim and begins to unleashes a barage of green balls at Rouge  
  
Rouge: OW DAMN IT!!!! SON-OF-A-BI...... OW SH.....AHHHHHHHHH STOOOOPPPPP  
  
Ania: WOW AWSOME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
suddenly the police barge in  
  
Chief: (on the megaphone) WE HAVE YOU SUROUNDED, COME OUT OF THE PARK WITH YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR  
  
Laguna: BUT WE HAVE RACKETS IN ONE HAND  
  
Chief: OK? WELL PUT THE RACKET IN ONE HAND AND YOUR OTHER HAND IN THE AIR  
  
Ania: WHICH HAND?  
  
Chief: UHHH....... IT DOEN'T MATTER  
  
Laguna: YES THERE IS!!! THERES A BIG DIFFERANCE BETWEEN THE LEFT AND THE RIGHT  
  
Chief: OK THE RIGHT  
  
Laguna: BUT I'M LEFT HANDED  
  
Chief: well uhh........???  
  
Rouge: ( ontop the ball machine) OH YEAH NOW YOUR GANNA GET IT!!!!! I WILL HAVE MY REVENGE  
  
she then starts to pummel the the others, the cops, and innocent bystanders and pedestrians  
  
Ania: ITS ALIVE!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: AAAAAHHHHHHHHH HAHAHAHAHA  
  
Rouge: I WANT MORE CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Ania: WE NEED MORE CHEESE!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
after a while of hitting th police with green tennis balls,she gets off the machine and with out notice they climb fence.  
  
Laguna: so what should we do now?  
  
Ania: LETS GO TO A PLACE AND SING SONGS AND PLAY INSTRIMENTS  
  
Rouge: DO INSTRIMENTS OF TORTURE COUNT?  
  
Laguna: YOU MORBID PERSON YOU  
  
Ania: YEAH SHE KNOWS  
  
Ania&Rouge: WE ALL KNOW  
  
Back to Kiros and Ward  
  
Kiros: THANK ALL THAT IS KIND AND HOLY THE BUS IS HERE  
  
Ward: now we can go down to that stadium but I still feel somethings wrong  
  
I'M DONE WITH THIS CHAPTER HOORAY, it sux that this program I'm typing on doesn`t check my words for mispelling, and it keeps going back to the 10 size font so I,m sorry if this is too small you can hardly read, cause I even need to wear my glasses when reading and typing it so sorry about this.  
  
What is Wards weird intuitions mean? Will we cause havoc once more? (you better hope so) Can my new Lava Lamp be any cooler? Find out in the upcoming Chapter, BUNNY BUTTER PANCAKES, bye now, OH and by the way! READ AND REVIEW THIS PLEASE 


	11. BUNNY BUTTER PANCAKES

Authors notes: Hmmmmmm it seems that I haven't in a while..... imagine that? I had to prepare for school, and all that crappity crapness.......crap!! CRAP!!!anyways, that cat is scaling the back of my shirt, I JUST SAW THE BRAK SHOW!!!!!! I love Brak, does anyone like Brak as much as I do? Also in the delay of updates I'm almost positive that no one cares........oh well, I like what I'm doing. This is not mine, I do not own this, I wish I did, I do not own the song we sang and all that crap, I guess I can deal with it.  
  
Back on the bus, where Kiros and Ward have finally found a seat,(WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE AND WHERE ARE THEY GOING AT 4 IN THE MORNING?)  
  
Kiros: Well we can only hope that we get there in time  
  
Ward: So tired, can't sleep........  
  
Kiros: that didn't make any sense at all  
  
Ward: that proves how tired I am.......(falls on the floor)  
  
Kiros: (takes mans umbrella and beats Ward with it) WAKE UP I DON'T WANT TO CARRY YOU OFF THIS BUS, WAKE UP DAMMIT WAKE UP!!!!!!!!  
  
Ward: fine.........  
  
Ward gets up and the bus finally goes into motion, Baaaaaack at the pub.......  
  
Rouge gets up to the mic and screams......  
  
Rouge: HELLO NEW YORK!!!!!!!!!  
  
Man: (distant) but this is Deling!!!  
  
Ania: WHATEVER!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: WERE GANNA SING TO YOUUUUUUUU........ok?  
  
Man2: whatever floats your boat.......  
  
All:.................HERE-WE-GO!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
They begin to play there instriments (of tourture to all)  
  
All: (singing while playing there instiments badly) I saw Daddy kissing Santa Claus, Underneath the mistletoe last night, He didn't see me creep, Down the stairs to have a peep, He thought that I was upstairs in my bedroom fast asleep,  
  
Rouge: Then I saw Daddy tickle Santa Claus, Underneath his beard so snowy white, There must be some mistake; Was I really awake? I rubbed my eyes and moved in close, a better look to take,  
  
Man: OH MY GOD MY EARSS!!!!!AAAAAHHHHHHHHH  
  
Ania: Then I saw Daddy hugging Santa Claus, He took his hand and pulled him to the couch, It must have been just fine, Santa didn't seem to mind, Then Daddy moved across the room to pour them both some wine,  
  
Man2: WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE?!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: Then I saw Daddy fondle Santa Claus, And on his ear he nibbled now and then. I crawled across the floor, I hid behind the door, I left it open just a crack so I could see some more.  
  
Man3: R RATED PEOPLE!! R RATED!!!!!!!!!  
  
All: Then I saw Daddy undress Santa Claus. They quickly threw their clothes on our big chair. Well, much to my surprise, I couldn't believe my eyes! It wasn't Santa after all but Mommy in disguise, (THEY BEGAN TO BREAK THEIR INSTRENMENTS)  
  
Man: AAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
All: When I saw Daddy kissing Santa Claus Underneath to mistletoe last night. Oh what I laugh it would have been, If I had REALLY seen, Daddy kissing Santa Claus last night!!!  
  
Laguna: thank you thank you  
  
Chairs are turned over, almost all of the people are gone and the some of people that are left are going through sezires ( how ever the hell you spell it I'm to lazy to get up and get a thesaurus), the bar tender smashed his head on the counter, the intsremnets are broken, it seems they got al little carried away and through one of the drums at the audience.  
  
Ania: (calm and gentle)and now for a slow loving song for everyone  
  
Most of the people that came out of there hidding places looked both distressed and relieved.  
  
All: (screaming) SHAKANNA-LALALALALALAAAAAAAAA-BUM-BUM-BUM-SMASH- AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Peoples ears are bleeding(cool huh?)ANYWAYS, back to Kiros and Ward  
  
Kiros: finally!!!!!!  
  
They get out of the bus and look up at the stadium  
  
Kiros: wow this is a big stadium!!!!  
  
Ward:(looks behind them) hey remember those weird plot intuitions I had earlier?  
  
Kiros: yeah why?  
  
Ward: (points behind them)  
  
Kiros looks behind them only to see that the stadium is settled infront of the pub they were just at.  
  
Kiros: HOLY SHI.......  
  
And so we end this chapter with those nutty questions I bet none of you read.....  
  
Will I keep on censoring Kiros's big kid words? Should I censor It? Will you tell me? find out in the the next chapter.....PAPER PLATE MAN, C-ya all = ) 


	12. PAPER PLATE MAN part 1

Authors Notes: hello everyone, I have news for you that may be disapointing and all but since Im back in school, I will have homework and social life to get back to and all, so expect more updates on the week ends and if I can some maybe on the week days. Hey if your into the ummmm.......NC-17 stuff I may make a lemon with Raine and Laguna, what do ya'll say? sound good? any ways, I do not own this at all. Kay?  
  
Kiros and Ward are in front of the pub again  
  
Ward: kind of ironic, huh?  
  
Kiros is banging his head on the light poll  
  
Kiros: WHY (bang) DIDN'T (bang) WE USE (bang)THE BUS (bang)FARE ON(bang) THE PHONE?????!!!!!!!!!  
  
Ward: your takeing this really hard arn't you?  
  
Kiros is still banging his head against the poll  
  
Ward: Kiros?  
  
Kiros: (stops) hold on a sec  
  
Kiros give it a good hard smack and falls unconscious  
  
Ward: ahh man........Im ganna miss whats on the TV  
  
suddenly poeple come out of the pub running  
  
Man: run for it!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Man2: they're crazy  
  
Woman: call the police  
  
suddenly Ania comes out of the out with a guitar neck in her hand  
  
Ania: HEY COME BACK WE WERE ABOUT TO DO THE SECOND VERSE!!!!!!!!  
  
Rouge: give it up you want to hear our lovely singing voices, you just don't know it yet!!!!!!  
  
Man: I would rather take my medication!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: hehe......medication  
  
Ania: whos coming off there sugar high?  
  
Both: WE ARE!!!!!  
  
Kiros: oh no you don't  
  
Ward: no more sugar for you  
  
Laguna: is....is it posible to use those words in a sentence?  
  
Ania: It just doesn't seem natural  
  
Kiros: quit it!! you guys have been on the news  
  
Ward: on TV more than once  
  
Kiros: and not to mention the body counts rising because of it  
  
Laguna: then why did you say it?  
  
Ward: your coming with us back to the hotel  
  
Laguna: (child like) NO!!! NO NO NO!!!!!  
  
Then they all ran off in to the streets  
  
Kiros: oh god no!!!!  
  
Ward: they have escaped!!!!  
  
Kiros: and that surprises you?  
  
Kiros and Ward start to run after them the best they could, mean while Laguna and gang still are running.  
  
Laguna: THIS IS A GOOD WAY TO GET RID OF THAT SUGAR, HUH?  
  
Ania: LETS GET SOME MORE  
  
Laguna: OK  
  
Rouge pulls up on a bicycle built for three  
  
Rouge: LOOK WHAT I TOOK FROM SOME PEOPLE  
  
Both: OOOOOHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Everyone hops on and start to pedel down the streets, Cars are turning rather sharp to miss us and everything, BUT you will have to wait till next time to find out what happens so ehhhh, sorry don't grip at me I get enough of it as it is.  
  
So how was that,I would Like to thank Chaos for sending me more than one review so this little dittys for you, also I am running a healthy competition against my friend Lyssa's (Ania) little sister, you see she has 29 reviews and 3 chapters but I have 22 reviews and 12 chapters so if I can just get past hers I would feel better at night. I know its a silly thing to cry over but IM A SILLY PERSON!!! so for the next few chapters will be a trilogy like star wars you know. anyways its dedicated to Chaos for his reviews and all so Tanky ^-^  
  
Will Kiros and Ward find a bike of their own? Will we get away with all the things we did? Will I convince my boyfrie...... ehhhhh never mind, to go to the movies with all my other friends? Wait and see in this Trilogy like thingy, PAPER PLATE MAN part 2, bye ^_~ 


	13. PAPER PLATE MAN part 2

Authors Notes: HOWDY, it me!!! the author!!! Short note. There will be a Lemon of mine coming out soon (not real soon, but soon) and It will have Raine and Laguna ^_~ any ways, you will read it.........please? I own nothing here, Kay?  
  
Laguna, Ania, and Rouge are on there little bike built for three and pettling like theres no tomorrow, (and in there case there might not be)  
  
Laguna: weeeeee?  
  
Ania: whoa I'm losing it, I feel pretty tired.  
  
Laguna: stay wake must...........ZZZZZZZZZZZZ  
  
Ania: Rouge we lost Laguna!!!!!  
  
Rouge: No, no we didn`t........ AWW hell we did didn't we?  
  
Ania: WE ARE GONNA DIE!!!!!!  
  
Rouge : NOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: AHHHHHHHHHH WE ARE ALL GONNA DIE!!!!!!!!!!!!!! PETAL FASTER!!!!!!!!!!! AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Rouge: that got him  
  
Ania: yup  
  
Kiros and ward are still trudging behind while Laguna and and the two are hitting mach 2.  
  
Kiros: what the fu.....  
  
Ward: (places hand over Kiros's mouth) censor  
  
Kiros: how can they run that fast?  
  
Ward: only god knows  
  
Back to the people on the bike  
  
Laguna: don't wanna die, don't wanna die, don't wanna...........  
  
Ania and Rouge have their feet up on the handle bar and are kicked back.  
  
Rouge: the only way to travel  
  
both: the only way to travel  
  
suddenly Laguna blacks out and seeing as the have no control over the bike, they crash off this bridge.  
  
Ania&Rouge: HOLY SHI....... (splash)  
  
an hour later Kiros and Ward pull the three out of the river, Kiros has Ania seeing as how shes the smallest and lightest, then Ward has Laguna and Rouge on his shoulders.  
  
Kiros: Well this is a great way to spend an night,trying to fish out your friends that crashed in the Deling City River!!!!!!!  
  
Ward: lets take them to the hotel and let them sleep a while.  
  
Back at the hotel.  
  
Rouge wakes up onl to find that she is tied to the bed  
  
Rouge: (weak) dammit............(falls asleep again)  
  
After a while a doctor comes in to inspect them.  
  
Doctor: well you all seem to be recovering just fine.  
  
Ania: (lifts her head slightly) B...B....Blow it out you azzzzzzzzzzzzzzz........(falls asleep)  
  
Doctor: recovering very nicely...... now lets check opon Mr. Loire shall we  
  
Laguna: ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZzz......... .........burp.....ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ  
  
Doctor: oh well I guess thats nice.............hey its time for ER  
  
Kiros: HEY, what about our friends? what do we do with them?  
  
Doctor: let them dream...........  
  
Ward: I heard that if you don't dream, you go insane.  
  
Kiros: that may explain alot.  
  
Ward:.................  
  
Kiros:.................  
  
Ward: Coffee?  
  
Kiros: alright!  
  
The next Chapter will be about there dreams the have while they are zonked out. also I would like to add that the future chapters and dedications check the reviews and and look for mine, it will tell you the future dedications and what will happen after that. any ways if you haven't read the author notes it SAYS that I have a Laguna and Raine Lemon coming up soon, alright so if you ignore those Authors notes in the past, IN THE FUTURE READ IT.........please!!! oh and also we need more reviews!!!!!! it modivates me.  
  
What dreams will We all have? What will happen when we wake up? DO I REALLY HAVE TO DO MY HOMEWORK? find out in the next chapter, PAPER PLATE MAN part 3, till then See ya all ^_~ 


	14. PAPER PLATE MAN part 2:a

Authors note: HEY every body!!! WWWUUUZZZUUUPPP?????? anyways the Lemon story is going good it will be longer than the three page chapter I have been writing so far. (thats right, every chapter you have been reading is at least 3 pages long) so any ways this is how the chapter for 14 is going around, there will be a chapter 14a, 14b, and a 14c. that will be explained to every one later on, now ON WITH THE SHOW.  
  
Laguna lies there snoring, so why don't we take a little peak in his head and see whats going down in that over abused brain of his as he takes a little trip to LALA LAND.  
  
Laguna: WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE...................... ......(passes out) gasp gasp gasp.............that was kool!!!!!!! I should do it again.  
  
Kiros: Laguna please save us, your our hero............  
  
Ward: please save us, we don't want it to get us.........  
  
suddenly a huge shadow comes of the wall and Kiros and Ward planted right behind Laguna holding on to his legs.  
  
Laguna: (heroic) not to worry, for it is I............LAGUNA bumbumBUUUUMMMM  
  
Kiros: Its got pointy nose that could peirce a torso  
  
Ward: its a massive creature, with a strong build, hold me......  
  
Laguna: nothing I can't handle  
  
suddenly this "masive" creature comes out and its.............MICHAEL JACKSON!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: (wide eyed)............................well Im done (walks off)  
  
Kiros: AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!! what are we going to do now? our hero is defeated!!!!!!!  
  
Ward: the world as we know it is crashing before my very eyes, NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!  
  
Then as if all is forgotten Laguna comes back  
  
Laguna: Ok Im ready  
  
Michael J: WWWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOO WWWWWWWHHHHHHOOOOOOO.................  
  
Laguna: (walks out again) GAAAAA......ick AAAAAHHHHH hahahahah HA HA HA HA, iceick......gaahhh  
  
Kiros: its to powerful, won't anyone help us?  
  
Laguna walks back with a bit of a twitch  
  
Laguna: ALRIGHTY THEN..........(does that little matrix mid-air kick and falls)  
  
Michael Jackson does his little moon walk around were Laguna lays  
  
Laguna: ITS HORRIBLE, HES TO STRONG!!!!!!! we need back up, quickly.......................  
  
20 minutes later.  
  
Laguna: hhhhhhhhmmmmmmmmmmmm.............................................Im stumped (looks over at Kiros and Ward)  
  
Kiros and Ward are still hiding from the dude (hehe 'DUDE')  
  
Laguna: by jove I think I have it!!!!!!! no wait........no.  
  
another 20 minutes later  
  
Kiros and Ward are playing go fish in their corner  
  
Kiros: got any 3's?  
  
Ward: uno.....  
  
Kiros: I WIN......... wait no I don't, damn.  
  
Laguna is in a thinking position, and Michael is singing beat it.  
  
Laguna: HEY do you know 'mary had a steamboat'?  
  
Michael: no.......  
  
Laguna: damn.................OH YEAH Im supose to be thinking of something........ but what was it?.................................. oh well, probably not that important!!! anyone up for a hotdog?  
  
All: WE ARE WE ARE  
  
they all go get hotdogs and have a merry time, then the go to Julia's and Laguna and her go out  
  
Julia: so Laguna, how is it being a super hero?  
  
Laguna: its a little stress on the muscles anyways  
  
Julia: awww, poor thing, here let me massage it for you  
  
back in the real world  
  
Laguna:(in his sleep) oh yeah a little lower, ohhhhhh that good  
  
Kiros and Ward have their coffee in one hand and are staring at him with wide eyes and loose there grip on reality and their coffee.  
  
Kiros:.................  
  
Ward:................  
  
Kiros: ever wonder what hes dr.....  
  
Ward: nope.  
  
And thats all for chapter 14a, and then Its will be time for Ania's dream next, so look forward to that one, and just to be polite, mine will be last, and then it will be chapter 15 and if you want to know the dedications look in my reviews at the top and look for my name thats "anuksulionrouge" alright and it will tell you everything. ALSO I figured out how that settings page works in m profile thing and now people that are not registered in fanfiction.net can review this, neat huh? well I think thats what its for....... oh well, AND NOW time for the questions:  
  
What is Anias dream ganna be about? What are they talking about while we are asleep? WILL I EVER FIND THAT PICTURE OF MY BOYF........ ahem ignore that last comment. Find out in PAPER PLATE MAN part 2:a, ^_~ (also those who like michael jackson please don't take it like I hate him, I like the guy and his music, well his old music anyway) 


	15. PAPER PLATE MAN part 2:b

Authors notes: Oh my!! I haven't updated this week!! I am truely sorry, really I am its just I have been so preoccupied with so many things, (NOT 9/11). Me and Lyssa (Ania) have been going roller blading and she brung my boyfriend (its pay back for when I took her somewhere with my boyfriend) any ways I had to get ideas for her dream sequence ladi-da....... you don't care all you want is the story, huh? my motto GIVE EM WHAT THEY WANT.  
  
Ania lied tossing and turning in her bed face down inhaling her pillow.  
  
Ania: ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzZZZZZZZZZZZZZ..................AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH...............ZZZ ZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZZ (cough)  
  
DREAM LAND~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
  
Ania is lounging in a chair drinking her soda in her swim suit at the beach  
  
Ania: SSSSSSLLLLLLLUUUUUUURRRRRRRPPPPPPPP.............BBBBBEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAALLLLLLL CCCCCCCCHHHHHH.....pardon me wheres my manners? BBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBBUUUUUUUUUU UUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU RRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRPPPPPPPPPP PPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPPP  
  
quiet and stillness surround Ania BUT............  
  
Ania: LETS DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN.....  
  
suddenly Rouge and Laguna and a many other people pop out of no were  
  
Rouge: its just a jump to the left.......  
  
All: then you step to the right............  
  
Laguna: put your hands on your hips........  
  
All: tuck your knees in tight......... then its the pelvic thrust........ that'll make you go insane...... LETS DO THE TIME WARP AGAIN..........  
  
Ania: OK thats enough of that......  
  
Rouge: CLEAR OUT  
  
everyone but Laguna and Rouge clear the area  
  
Laguna: whatcha wanna do?  
  
Rouge:(shrugs)........hic  
  
Ania:............  
  
Laguna:.............  
  
suddenly Rouge and Laguna break into song  
  
Rouge: how do you do I.......  
  
Laguna: see you've met my.....  
  
Rouge: faithful handy-man  
  
he's just a little f**ked up because.......  
  
Laguna: when you knocked......  
  
Rouge: he thought you were the ........candy man.....  
  
Laguna: don't get stung out.....by the way I look....  
  
don't judge a book by its cover.....  
  
Ania decides to join in on the Rocky Horror parody ( I don't own the songs, might be fun if I did though)  
  
Ania: hes not much of a man by the light of day......  
  
Laguna: but by night I'm one hell of a lover.....  
  
I'm just a sweet transvestite  
  
Rouge: from Trans-sexual, Transelvania  
  
Ania: have we got the songs out of our head yet?  
  
Both: yeah  
  
Ania: WELL I HAVEN'T!!!!!!!!!  
  
Both: too bad  
  
Ania: oh.........FOOOD!!!!!!  
  
Laguna:can I take of this dress now?  
  
Rouge: no way we were going to a male strip bar  
  
Ania: REALLY?!!!!!  
  
Rouge: no  
  
Ania: (drops to knees) NNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO........................ok Im done.  
  
Laguna: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
  
Rouge: WHAT?!!!!!  
  
Laguna: I got a run in my hose.........  
  
Ania:(sarcastic) you poor thing........  
  
Rouge: don't diss Laguna like that!! you can have mine Laguna  
  
Laguna: really  
  
Rouge: NO LOSER, HAHAHAHAHAHAH  
  
Ania & Rouge: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH  
  
Laguna: THATS IT (tackles Rouge)  
  
IN THE REAL WORLD~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~~~~~  
  
Ania: (screaming) LEFT, RIGHT, KICK HIM KICK HIM, KICKHIMINTHENUTS, OHHHHHHHHH  
  
Kiros: boy oh boy, this is an interesting day, wonder what Rouge is dreaming  
  
Ward: strap her in good  
  
Kiros: reading ya loud and clear  
  
Kiros goes over and secures Rouge in tightly.  
  
Well how did you like that? sorry I haven't updated in a while, been busy..........and lazy. DID YOU HEAR THAT THERES NO MORE NC-17 NOW, tell me does that seem wrong to anyone but me. Lyssa and I are severly pissed off now, and I was almost done with my Lemon too. it only needed a paragraph, then here comes "the lemon hating shredder" then BEEOOP there it goes, shredded and flushed down the toilet, you know what I say? PROTEST. ok on to those ever so loved questions:  
  
Will the makers of Rocky Horror Picture Show sue us for the use of their songs? Whats Rouge Dreaming? Will the sudden urge to play video games ever stop? find out in the last chapter of the trilogy, PAPER PLATE MAN part3:b 


	16. PAPER PLATE MAN part 2:c

Authors Notes: HOWDY, hey everyone, this will be the last chapter for my first trilogy,AWWWWWW!!!! but not to fear my children, the second trilogy is dedicated to Tigerofthewind!! Then my last trilogy for a while will be dedicated to Cryo-chan, HORRAY for all of my special internet buddys. Im glad that Im not the only one depressed about the baning of NC-17, thanks peoples, sorry that I can't update as often as I use to, to much on my mind, you know good grades, friends, boyfriend ( heh heh ~_^ ) and all that other good stuff, so don't expect an new update every weekend like I said in the past, SORRY please don't hate me : ( anyways on with MY dream. oh yeah, I own nothing in this. so there.  
  
We see Rouge tossing and turning in her bed, back and forth, the going round and round in circles.  
  
Rouge: (snoring) ZZZZZzzzzzzZZZZZZZzzzzzz...........choke.............ZZZZZZZZZZzzzzzzzzzzzz. ......... hehe WEEEEEEEEE  
  
Kiros: is there any way to make her stop spining?  
  
Ward: HHHHHHHHHmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm................................................ ....................nope.  
  
suddenly Laguna wakes up  
  
Laguna: OUUUUCHH............. too low, MUCH to low................. hey everyone, WUZZZUP?  
  
Kiros: MAKE HER STOP SPINING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Ward: SHES DRIVING US NUTS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: OK let me try  
  
Laguna spits on his hands and looks serious, then holds his hands out in front of him.  
  
Laguna: STOP  
  
Rouge is still spining  
  
Laguna: thats all I can do  
  
Suddenly Rouge wakes up Screaming  
  
Rouge: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh...........gasp  
  
Kiros: WHAT WHAT  
  
Rouge: I HAD A NIGHTMARE.................... WWWWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
  
Kiros: STOP  
  
Rouge: OK  
  
Ania: What was it about?  
  
Kiros: where did you come from?  
  
Ania:?????????...............(wispering to self) Damn the earthlings are on to me  
  
Rouge: well it was horrible, I half to tell you  
  
Ward: who has to go to the bathroom?  
  
everyone begins to clutter around Ward and get up  
  
Rouge: SIT YOUR COACH ASS DOWN  
  
everyone sits  
  
Rouge: well Im all alone in this very dark cave, then things started coming out of the ground like worms or something and then all of a sudden ........... oh its to horrible to tell  
  
Kiros: good cause I don't want to hear it  
  
everyone else SSSSHHHH at Kiros  
  
Ania: what happened?  
  
Rouge: well I examined this crack int the wall and I found this room, so I go in and this and Its like covered in these posters like a hard rock fan's room and there was this tape player............I don't think I can go on  
  
Kiros: good  
  
everyone else shhh at Kiros  
  
Ania: please go on Rouge  
  
Rouge: (begins to cry) well, then I looked inside the player and I found a CD and I began to play it, then Britney Spears Comes out of no where and began dancing  
  
Ania: you poor thing  
  
Rouge: so I ran and ran and I ran into the backseat boys  
  
Ania: don't you mean "Backstreet" boys  
  
Rouge: (crying really hard) SAME DIFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Ania: whoa.......cool  
  
Rouge: I don't think I can look at a CD player the same anymore  
  
Ward: who can blame you  
  
Laguna: well since we all are awake what shouyld we do?  
  
Kiros: NO ......  
  
Ward: MORE........  
  
Both: SUGAR........  
  
Rouge: WWWWWWWWWAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I want Ice cream  
  
Ania: look what you've done now, you made Rouge cry  
  
Kiros: thats the last thing we need  
  
Rouge: (pointing)OH MY GOD WHAT THE F***K IS THAT???????  
  
Kiros & Ward: (turn around) WHERE??????  
  
while they turn around Ania, Laguna, and Rouge tie them to their chairs  
  
Ward: why didn't I see this coming?  
  
Kiros: WHY DIDN"T YOU SEE THIS COMING?  
  
Rouge: well bye bye everyone we got a date with the pastry shop  
  
Laguna: oh boy  
  
Kiros: well this sucks ass  
  
Ward: tell me about it  
  
Thats the end of my first Trilogy, hip-hip-horray. Today was Homecoming at my school, and at the end of the pep rally, I saw my boyfriend, sucha sweet heart waiting for me and all ( I should stop talking about him shouldn't I) its an illness, I either have to grip, make people laugh, or be obsessed over someone or somthing, now you know a little bit abou me, ON TO THE QUESTIONS  
  
What new about the NEXT trilogy? Will Kiros and Ward be found? Will my new fear of CD players ever go away? find out in the NEXT trilogy (dedicated to Tigerofthewind, thanks ~_^) PORKYPINES IN THE TOILET, bye ~~~~~~~~ 


	17. PORKYPINES IN THE TOILET

Author notes: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!! ouchy, my back!!!! sorry for such a delay. my back has been hurting so much lately and its getting harder just to sit still, so I haven't updated in a while, sorry about that. But just to tell you that I have went to the doctor and got some drugs for it so Im fine and ready for typing. I own nothing, ladie- freakin-da............  
  
Kiros and Ward are still tied to the chair and are faced away from each other  
  
Kiros: well this is getting to be totally hopeless  
  
Ward: yup  
  
Kiros: well never catch them, its no use  
  
Ward: yup  
  
Kiros: is that all your going to say?  
  
Ward: yup  
  
Kiros: what are you doing back there?  
  
Ward is seen playing video games on his little gameboy  
  
Ward: nothing special.......HIGHSCORE  
  
Kiros: HEY, let me play!!  
  
Ward: get your own  
  
Kiros: oh come on  
  
Ward: NO cause you always beat my score  
  
Kiros: Its not my fault that your a totally lousy game player  
  
Ward does this stretch thing and breaks the ropes  
  
Ward: WHAT WAS THAT?  
  
Kiros: (frightened) you have a lovely speaking voice.............  
  
Ward: THATS NOT WHAT I HEARD...................you really think so?  
  
Kiros: (shaky) oh......yeah........you make....uh......Wayne Newton blush with shame  
  
Ward: well shucks..........lets go get them morons  
  
Kiros: why try? we tried everything to get a hold of them  
  
Ward: not everything  
  
Kiros: what do you mean by that?  
  
Ward: I don't know  
  
Kiros: oh well, lets go.  
  
We now follow Laguna, Ania, and Rouge as they go walking down the street  
  
Laguna: Hey its almost halloween isn't it?  
  
Ania: yup  
  
Rouge: what should we go as?  
  
Ania: I want to ba a karate werewolf  
  
Rouge: I want to be a trench coat wearing zombie  
  
Laguna: I'm going to be the sariest thing in this world  
  
Ania: and that is......?  
  
Laguna: a male Britany Spears  
  
Rouge: OOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHOHOHO, AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH.................THE NIGHTMARES, THE NIGHTMARES..............(crying)  
  
Laguna: geeze sorry I just thought that I should be scary  
  
Ania: it worked and your not even wearing a costume  
  
Rouge: the horrible horrible nightmares  
  
Laguna: sorry  
  
Rouge: lets get our costumes together  
  
Ania: alrighty  
  
Laguna: OK maybe not a male Britany Spears. Maybe a dead person, with pig tails! no thats not it.........  
  
Back to Kiros and Ward  
  
Kiros: I can't believe that they pulled this stunt  
  
Ward: well this is Laguna we're talking about  
  
Kiros: oh yeah................don't remind me  
  
Ward: were would I go if I were Laguna?  
  
Kiros: probibly a mask shop  
  
Ward: how do you figure that?  
  
Kiros: Weird plot intuition?  
  
Ward: I'm rubbing off on you Kiros, admit it!  
  
Kiros: I hate you  
  
Ward: well where do we go from here  
  
Kiros: where else, Party City  
  
Back to Laguna and co.  
  
Laguna: hey, since its almost Halloween, won't most shops be out of all the good stuff?  
  
Rouge: not is we go to Spencers!!!  
  
Ania: they have every thing!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: cool  
  
Rouge: I just need make up  
  
Ania: maybe I will go as something else like a goth or a Zombie  
  
Rouge: or both  
  
Laguna: ITS PURE GENIOUS!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Rouge: what are you going to be?  
  
Laguna: Hell if I know  
  
Ania: YOU CAN BE A DEVIL!!!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: yeah I could be satan  
  
Rouge: totally!!!!!  
  
  
  
Well Howdy everyone, My backs doing so much better, My doctor is a nut he doesn't even tell me whats wrong all he does is give me medicine, that stuff totally messes with your emotions, so during this I was depressed, then I was happy. The halloween bit is really what I'm going to be, a Zombie in a trench coat, Lyssa still doesn't know what shes going to be but it may be a Gothic Zombie, Tell me what your going to be for Halloween. its probibly better than mine, and also due to the fact that my teach is being a total ass, my update schedule will be replaced with many bookreports so be patient, I know how you feel, and so on with those crazy Questions:  
  
What will Laguna be for Halloween? Will Kiros and Ward ever find out that we arn't going to Party City? Do half of you people know that party city is a real store? ( I wouldn't put it past me!) find out in the next Part to this totally differant Trilogy, PORKYPINES IN THE TOILET part 2, bye ~_^ ( for a little fun count how many times I said "totally" in this chapter) 


	18. PORKYPINES IN THE TOILET part 2

Author Notes: hi everyone, my costumes together, hey WE NEED REVIEWS for the last chapter we only got 1 review, thats awfully sad to me, boohoo. Sorry to say but on my 20th chapter I will end this story and start a NEW STORY, Its like a sequal to this, it may have a few new things like:  
  
new names for the original characters  
  
more original character (maybe Ill do an interview with my reviewers to see who)  
  
INTERMISSION SONGS AND COMMERCIALS  
  
random things, like no chapter is the same, or a run on off the last chapter  
  
talkshows, cooking shows, news cast, ect...  
  
this ones ganna kick ASS, tell me what you think ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ~~  
  
Rouge, Laguna, and Ania are at Spencers looking at masks and make-up  
  
Laguna: how about that one?  
  
Rouge: no, how about this one?  
  
Ania: no, how about this one?  
  
Both: NO  
  
Laguna: THAT ONE IS SO GRUESOME  
  
Rouge: SO REVOLTING  
  
Ania: ITS SO SICKENING  
  
Man: THATS MY FACE!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Ania: RUNN FORR ITT  
  
Kiros and Ward are at Party City supposibly looking for Laguna, Ania, and Rouge  
  
Kiros: well this is a real let down  
  
Ward: we should ask someone  
  
Kiros goes over to an employee  
  
Kiros: have you seen three weird, hyper, and disturbing people? a man, a freakishly tall girl, and a hyper active one acompanying her  
  
Employee: ya, they were causing havoc among the customers, so the police came and took them away  
  
Kiros: OHHHHH MANNN, we got to go bail them out  
  
Ward: oh well this chase might accually come to an end  
  
Kiros: hey your right, WWWWWOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHOOOOOOOOOOOO  
  
And so Kiros and Ward change their plans and decide to go to the police station and bail out their 'friends'  
  
Kiros: hello we are here to bail out our friends  
  
Police man: uh huh  
  
Kiros: they were causing chaos at party city?  
  
Police man: oh those freaks? we sent them to the asylum across town  
  
Ward: damn, another goose chase  
  
Kiros: lets start walking  
  
Ward: sigh.........  
  
back at Spencers  
  
Rouge: I FOUND MAKE-UP!!!!!! YAY!!!  
  
Ania: your going to share that right?  
  
Rouge: (hands Ania some make-up) no  
  
Laguna: look Im a tiger  
  
Rouge: (twitches)AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I.....LOVE........ITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT  
  
Laguna: yay  
  
Rouge: THEY HAVE MEGADETH CD's!!! AND MARLYN MANSON, AND OZZY BOBBLE HEAD DOLLS AND MORE CD'S, ITS HEAVEN I TELL YOU HEAVEN  
  
Ania: AAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH COOOOOOOOOLLLLLLLLLLL  
  
Laguna: whos Ozzy?  
  
Rouge: (wide-eyed) YOU DON'T KNOW WHO OZZY IS?  
  
Laguna:................no  
  
Rouge attacks Laguna  
  
Rouge: HOW COULD YOU NOT KNOW, HE IS ONLY THE KING OF DARKNESS, no.......THE KING OF F***ING DARKNESS, HE IS LIKE A GOD!!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: I........DIDN'T........KNOW!!!!!! HONEST  
  
Ania tries to pry Rouge off Laguna  
  
Ania: its all right Rouge, the king of darkness forgives him  
  
Rouge: NO  
  
Ania:(lets go of Rouge) nice knowing you pal  
  
Laguna: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
  
  
  
HI!!!!!!!! I just saw The Ring, freaky-ass-movie, I don't think I can stand having my TV in my room any more. Anyway if you read the author notes I will quit this story on my 20th chapter and start an new. tell me how you feel! and if you want to make guest appearances tell me on my reviews, and give me your E-mail address and i'll send a list of questions to you and see I your insane enough, and the questions will end on Thanksgiving, so anything after that will not be accepted, ok? on to the questions:  
  
Will Kiros and Ward find us in time? Will I ever be able to go asleep with out unplugging my TV again? Will I get more than 1 review this time? find out in our next chapter, PORKYPINES IN THE TOILET part3, adios ~_^ 


	19. PORKYPINES IN THE TOILET part 3

Authors notes: I'm making a new story, and this chapter is the last of my trilogy, so I couldn't get to the other dedications in time, but the thing is up to 20 chapters, you kind of get bored of the story line and you run out of ideas for that story and you just want to start over again, so please understand and don't be mad with me, I just can't think of anything funny that has to with this subject, so thats the reason it ends so suddenly, but the other dedications will be anounce during my new story so those who feel left out, you'll get your chance, just be patient with me ~_^ sorry!  
  
Ania, Laguna, and rouge are walking down the street with there costumes on and Rouge is dancing to Rob Zombie on her CD player  
  
Ania: Hey we beat the halloween rush!!  
  
Laguna: hey ya  
  
Rouge: (singing to "dragula")Dig through the ditches,  
  
Burn through the witches  
  
I slam in the back of my  
  
Dragula  
  
Ania: hey Rouge thats a nice CD player you have there, its even red!!!  
  
Rouge: Dead I am the dog, hound of hell you cry  
  
Devil on your back, I can never di......CD PLAYER!!!!!!!!  
  
Rouge quickly throws the CD player and stomps on top  
  
Ania: ROUGE!!!!!!! ROB ZOMBIE WAS IN THAT!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Rouge: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH  
  
brushes through the remains of the CD player to find that the CD was not broken  
  
Rouge: HAHAHAHAHA ZOMBIE CAN'T DIE!!!!!!!!  
  
Ania: now how will you lisen to it?  
  
Rouge stand silent for a while  
  
Laguna: Rob........... Zombie? Whaaaa......?  
  
Rouge looks at Laguna with a distressed/ I-will-kill-you look  
  
Laguna:(obviously lying) ohhhhh yeah Rob Zombie can't get enough of that guy..........hehehe........ahem  
  
Rouge: Then whats my fav. song?  
  
Ania: I KNOW THAT ONE, MEMEMEMEMEMEMEME!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: uh................  
  
Rouge: Its my favorite song, Im dressed up like the title of the song?  
  
Laguna: uh.........living dead?  
  
Rouge tackles Laguna and is banging his head into the ground  
  
Ania: hah, it was living dead girl!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: I.......(bang)...........am.......(bang).......SORRY..........(bang)  
  
Rouge: apoligy accepted, CANDY  
  
Both: YAY  
  
Down at the insane asylem  
  
Kiros: we are here to release our friends, you take names right?  
  
White coat man: sorry, they sometimes make up names and we can't get their names correctly, can you describe them?  
  
Ward: well ones is a guy with dark brown hair and is kind of long  
  
Kiros: and theres two girls, one is really tall with long/long hair, and the other is a.........uhhhhh  
  
Ward: we don't know how to explain her  
  
Kiros: HYPER  
  
White coat man: those three terrorizing people at party city? yeah there here let me go get them  
  
Kiros: I hope the white straight-jackets included  
  
White coat man: (comes back) here they are  
  
there stood three hippies, two with long hair and one in tie-dye  
  
Kiros: (wide-eyed) uuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh.................?  
  
White coat man: these three are against halloween and desided to scare people out of Party City  
  
Ward: SON OF A BI............  
  
whoa censor.......anyways Im sorry to say but one more chapter and then no more updates for this story, but not to frieght my little minions, there will be a new story called INSANITYS GREATEST MOMENTS, staring my friend Ania (you should know her by now), and my name will be changed Zom (replaced Rouge ~_^ ) and that loveable guy Laguna, so don't miss it:  
  
Will Ward and Kiros stop swearing? Will we get candy? Will you people REVIEW THIS STORY? find out in our upcoming, and last chapter, HOLY TACO- LUPA, bye ~_^ 


	20. HOLY TACOLUPAend chapter

Author notes: don't worry everyone, I'll make a deal with you, you read my new story and see if you like it or not, if you like it I will keep it going until I decide to stop it, then maybe after its done I will start a part 2 with the Truth About Kool-Aid, but if you don't like it I willcontinue with this story, but I must warn you, I'm practically out of ideas for this story line, alright? Just give my story a chance please, good things don't last for ever, unfortunatly.  
  
Laguna, Ania, and Rouge are walking down the streets in their Halloween costume, Laguna a Lion, Ania a Dead gothic person, And Rouge a living dead girl. they come to their first house.  
  
They knock on the door  
  
Ania: Hi...........Candy!!!!!  
  
Laguna: TREEEEEATS!!!!!!!  
  
Rouge: I Love You  
  
the person looks at these people with a questionable face  
  
All: trick or treat  
  
Person: have you people gone insane?  
  
Rouge: no....  
  
Laguna: maybe....  
  
Ania: YES  
  
Person: its almost Christmas, Halloween long gone by now......  
  
Laguna: we missed Halloween  
  
Ania & Rouge: NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Person: I feel sorry for you three, here have some left over turkey..........  
  
the three looked very please, considering they missed Halloween  
  
All: WE GET TURKEY SPOILES!!!!!!! YAY  
  
Rouge:since its christmas I want to try a move my brother taught me  
  
Laguna: OK  
  
Ania: ooooooooooooooohhh.........  
  
Rouge: its called the 'nutcracker'!!!!!!!  
  
and with a swift movement of her leg she kicks Laguna square in the [censor]........hey thats fun[censor][censor][censor] heeheheheheheh....oh yeah back to the story  
  
Laguna: HA i'm wearing a cup hahahahah [censor]..... hey that is fun  
  
Ania: let me try [censor] heheheheh[censor][censor][censor][censor][censor][censor] HAHAHAHA  
  
All:HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHHAHHAHAH  
  
Rouge: OK my try [CENSOR]  
  
Laguna: [censor]  
  
Ania: [censor]  
  
All: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH  
  
Unknown voice: HEY!!!!!! LESS CENSOR MORE STORY, NOW!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Laguna: Hey who is that?  
  
Unknown voice: Im the author  
  
Ania: but the authors down here  
  
Rouge: yeah the authors down here  
  
Author: Im the authors voice  
  
Ania: ooooooooohhhh voices  
  
Rouge: but that would mean your me, and Im you, but Im not really you, I'm just a figure that distracts you so in reality; I'm a voice, but that would mean that your my voice and you speak to me and the others.... you wouldn't tell them my secrets would you?  
  
Author: like your afraid of the dark?  
  
Rouge: YES!!  
  
Author: and that you play with a stuffed tiger named bess, and you were the one that set the roof on fire?  
  
Rouge: WWWWWWHHHHHHHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA  
  
Laguna: HAHAHAHAHA  
  
Ania: HEHEHEHEHEHEH  
  
Rouge: you lie, YOU LIEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!  
  
Author and that you switched your sisters birth control pills with laxatives?  
  
Rouge: no......well that was funny, hehe  
  
Author: and that time you put iching powder in her tampons?  
  
All: HAHAHAHAHAHAHAH  
  
Author: yeah those were the better days.  
  
Ania: so what are you doing here?  
  
Author: I came to tell you the future  
  
Laguna: really what am I going to be doing in 20 years  
  
Author: don't know haven't finished the game yet  
  
Laguna: huh? what game?  
  
Author: nothing forget what last comment  
  
Laguna: kay  
  
Ania: whats going on, how come you just now appear?  
  
Author: didn't feel like talking to you people, besides I had dentist apointments never wanted to talk after that you tend to drool all over everything  
  
Rouge: very understandable  
  
Author: I just cam to tell you that somthing really cool will soon happen to you. see ya  
  
And with that the author is gone  
  
Laguna: that was weird  
  
A Movie man comes over to the three  
  
Man: hold on, let me look at ya, you look like a million bucks, and that million could be in my.... I mean our wallets, what do you say how about making some T.V. shows with me, I've seen you three before In the news on the T.V. PURE GENIOUS, how about it? Ther will be News Cast.....  
  
Laguna: oh.....  
  
Man: Cooking channels...  
  
Ania: OH  
  
Man: music videos  
  
Rouge: OHH!!!!  
  
Man: Comercials!!!!!  
  
All: OOOOOOOOHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  
  
Man: just sign here on the dotted line  
  
The man brings out his contract and a really nice pen, and soon they all sign their names  
  
Man: by the way my names M.O. Pignium Patterson, well we start on thursday  
  
Then mister Patterson skips away merrily  
  
The Author returns  
  
Author: wasn't that cool guy?  
  
Rouge: what just happened?  
  
  
  
Well I'm sorry to say but thats the last Chapter for T.T.A.K-A, but hey a new story of mine was just released yesterday,its not a Laguna tale but its a story about a Vampire and the World she lives in, its called The Chronicles of the Vampire, check it out if your into that sort of thing.  
  
Sorry to say but for now, Peace...... and Merry X-mas, see the new story in January~~ Love you all ~_^  
  
~INSANITYS GREATEST MOMENTS coming soon 


End file.
